For Sale: One Actress

Someone just got PAID!  Looking very unlike herself, Kate’s gone all Raquel Welch in Planet of the Apes in this version of her new Absolut ads.  Now I’m not an agent but if you’re looking to get more legit, non-sexpot movie rolls, this might not be the right way to go.  There’s nothing wrong with shilling – the A listers do it all the time, they just have the smarts to do it outside of the country, so that it doesn’t impact their status (just their wallets).

Of course, nothing says I’m doing this for art more than posing a bra and leggings, on your knees.  And by art, I mean $.

Fashion Schizophrenia

There are some ladies who always get it right.  And then there’s Kate who either always wears the same thing or mixes it up rarely, but to bad effect.  There’s nothing inherently wrong with this look but it’s very Spokesmodel category.  And that’s even without addressing the gloomy color.  At an event a few nights later, she looks younger, more creative and fun – even while she’s in black.  Diagnosis:  Fashion schizophrenia.  Prescription:  Repeat mantra “fashion should be fun” until you believe it.

Short Shift

I always complain that Kate never takes risks and ends up looking the same on every red carpet.  So she finally changes it up and ends up still kind of looking the same.  How weird is that?  Instead of her long Grecian gowns, we get a mini-dress with blue suede shoes yet the whole look still feels safe and dull.  At this point, I’d prefer that she go edgy or daring or even Amish just to switch it up.  I get that not everyone’s meant to be a fashion innovator but if you’re going to get snapped on the red carpet, you’ve got to give it more flair that this.

Dreary Drapes

You’re the lead in a movie.  It’s your premiere.  And you go for…ill-fitting black drapes?  I mean it looks like someone just unwrapped a bolt of fabric and swung it around her a few times.  Actually, it looks very much like Eva Mendes’ GG silhouette which doesn’t surprise me as both are styled by Rachel Zoe.  And if you’re going so simple, why not zhoosh it up with some bold jewelry on that blank canvas?  A missed opportunity to have a wow moment, as Rachel would say.

Fashion Citizen’s Arrest: Repeat Offenders

I’m tired of seeing B in these dresses.  They emphasize all the wrong areas and aren’t fashion forward.  Where is Sasha Fierce hiding? 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I’ve complained about Eva before and even though she looks good, I’m bored.  Red satin fishtail dress?  Yawn.

 

 

 

 

 

Penelope, donde esta el fashion sense?  She’s usually very glam and this nude gown does nothing for her curves.  Another snoozer, saved slightly by great hair and makeup.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Salma, you need to retire this look.  While it showcases your assets, it’s time to find a new silhoutte.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Is Kate making a face because she realized she’s worn this dress to every awards show for the last five years?